Poetics and Ruminations

Miss Pussy's Parlor Songs, Part Sixteen

 

 

XMAS TAX

 

Xmas is coming,

The rich are getting fat,

Please put a dollar

In Donald Trump’s hat;

If you haven’t got a dollar

A billion ought to do —

If you do not have a billion,

Well boo-hoo-hoo,

How sad for you!

 

 

WHENCE

 

Whence cometh Melania?

Is it from Albania?

No, from someplace greenier --

A valley in Slovenia!

Is Donald Trump her senior?

Yes, and he's much meanier.

 

 

THE AXE

 

Axe me no questions

And I'll tell you lies:

We're cutting your taxes

And, quick as time flies,

Your tax cuts expire,

But not those we gave

To the big corporations,

And that's why we rave.

You get what you pay for,

So you're getting nothing,

No roads, rails or bridges,

And that's really something

To put in the books

For following ages --

Local taxes go up

And down go your wages!

Merry Xmas, dear neighbor,

Happy New Year, you chump!

Get up on your roof, and

Get ready to jump!

 

 

CHALOO, CHALLAY!

 

Chaloo challay,

It’s Xmas Day,

And Donald Trump

Says we can say

“Merry Christmas”

once again —

Oh, Happy Day,

Chaloo challay

Donnie Trump

Says it’s okay!

He makes me feel

So goddam gay!

 

From MISS PUSSY'S PARLOR SONGS by Claudette McFang.

 

 

KUDOS FOR CLAUDETTE

 

Claudette McFang has passed the test:

this pussycat can say it best!

Congress, the White House, the boudoir—

Claudette knows where the stories are

and tells them as they should be told.

Her facts are right, her lingo’s bold,

and she defends the righteous cause

with sharp and deadly verbal claws!

 

Rhina P. Espaillat

The Sonnetarium

 

THE XMAS BLUES

 

It’s Christmas Eve down at the Cabaret.

The combo’s swinging at the Cabaret—

Some of the dancers are in disarray.

 

We’re waiting for Santa to come jiving by,

Jiving along as he comes juking by,

Ringing his bells and flying kind of high.

 

Jerry whacks the keys, George bops the vibes,

Hugh hoots his horn while George raps on the vibes

And here and there a customer imbibes

 

A cup of nog or a glass of scuppernong,

A mug of yuletide cheer or some scuppernong To help

him listen to the Turk’s torchsong.

 

The band is wailing and Santa’s overdue.

He’s sporting red, but he’ll be swinging blue.

 

The Sonnetarium (Via Folios)

Mar 13, 2018

by Lewis Turco

Paperback

$12.00^$ 12 ⁰⁰ Prime

FREE Shipping on eligible orders

Miss Pussy's Bedrom Ballads

MISS PUSSY'S BEDROOM BALLADS

by Claudette McFang

 

 

MOORE OR LESS

 

Judge Roy Moore was never dirty,

He liked young girls for their purity,

So he hung out at the 'Bama mall

To find if he could do them all.

 

 

LOURING

 

NBC host Matthew Lauer

Invited maidens to his tower,

There to work on them his will —

Some of them may be there still.

 

 

FRANKEN

 

Our good Senator Al Franken

Says he’s sorry he was skankin’

Girls on tours with the USO —

Ship him out on a UFO!

 

 

CHARLIE ROSE

 

He arose,

Charlie Rose,

Then he flashed her,

Charlie Rose!

 

When it rose

He dropped his clothes...,

And there it was:

Charlie's rose!

 

 

DEEP FEELER

 

Garrison Keillor was a very deep feeler,

And quite a deep feeler was he,

He felt for his women, he felt for his girls,

He felt for them while they drank tea!

 

 

BATON

 

James Levine, James Levine,

Waved a baton that few have seen

At some young fellas when each was a teen —

And now they are calling the conductor their queen.